Breathe Underwater

The past month has been an interesting one. A messy one. A month filled with discoveries and adaptations. I've learned a great deal, one way or another, where I enjoyed the process or not, and yet there are questions which remain and rise to howl at my walls in the oh-dark-thirty hours. Now as many of my dear friends are travelling and beginning to start their latest round of courses, I myself am asking, like many of you are asking, where on earth did the summer go?

My poor pitiful cellphone will never quite capture this cotton candy colors.

Nommages: Many a healthy thing, I've been truly enjoying the produce sales that comes with this time of year, devouring oranges and plums and grapes whenever I can. I'm attempting to cut down on starches (potato, sweet potato, how I love thee), and constantly work in my greens and vegetables. Stuffed clams, kielbasa, and discovering new ways to cook chicken. Fajitas are as always a favorite. The shift in more greens less roots is working though, clothes are fitting more like they are meant to.

Listening: I made a playlist not too long ago called Devil On The Bayou, and even though I'm no where near writing my Purga novels, its still a wonderful thing for muggy summer days. It features Gin Wigmore, Ida Maria, Black Keys, and Dead Weather to name a few. On days when I need new sounds, Massive Attack, Pink, Florence + the Machine, and Garbage happen frequently. Delta Rae would probably sum up the last month nicely.

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Writing: Sigil is coming along fantastically. The world unfolds and continues to surprise me. I love when the characters and their universe surprise, it means I'm doing it exactly right. My work articles have shifted so I'm doing less small-business and more writing on SEO and Things I Studied In College, so I'm happy to see the work load getting even easier to manage. Fanfic is on the back burner but I hope recent changes will give me more time to bang out a chapter or two, if the only for the amusement of my fandom friends.

Friendly Folks: Old friends and new have been finding their way into my life again this past month. If I dont hear from Aly once in a day I honestly questions whether she is okay, and will usually shoot her a text asking if I need to murder someone. Rob is working again so I see him less, but he's always happy to come out with his beautiful new car when he can. My Dad seems to be well, he cooked dinner without nearly killing us all, ie was actually sober. Mom keeps calling too. Many changes in personal relationships. I work to remind myself that its my life and I am in control and can change them back in any way I see fit.

Blondes may in fact have more fun.

Actions: I made an attempt at running and nearly killed myself, because my legs want to sprint and my lungs simply cannot keep up. The sad truth is I can't run just yet with music, and might need a running buddy to teach me this thing called pacing. I did finally get to go to the beach with Brosef and Babu and it was the best day in the ocean I have ever had. I've been learning so much from hooping these past few weeks, though. I have bruises and swollen hands from new hooping things learned, and they are pains I carry happily. I've also decided to quit drinking for the next six months, at least. It could be a forever thing, but we will see how it goes.

Inner-words: Lately my inner-words are a great deal of questions. What is wrong and right? Does any of it even matter? Is the woman I am today someone I would have liked to meet a few years ago? When is someone worth my time, and when is it alright to simply let go? Control. Persistence. Progress. Honor. Grace. These are the words I strive to hold in my mind, push into every breath, every step, every touch of life.